


Don't Let Me Fall

by brokenhighways



Category: Hit the Floor (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:54:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22242907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokenhighways/pseuds/brokenhighways
Summary: Jude's the long time fixer for the Los Angeles Devils. He's used to being looked through and ignored by everyone while he cleans up their mess behind the scenes. However, everything changes when the newly arrived power-forward Zero takes a sudden interest in him.
Relationships: Jude Kinkade/Zero | Gideon
Comments: 24
Kudos: 229
Collections: Hit The Floor ▶ Zero / Jude Kinkade, Zude





	Don't Let Me Fall

Jude's used to being invisible.

Despite the fact that he's taller than average, gangly and long-limbed, people don't notice him. He's talked over, ignored, pushed around and steamrolled on a daily basis to the point where he finds comfort in it. 

Everything is okay in his little bubble. 

Working for his father's basketball team, the Los Angeles Devils, is perfect for him. 

Everyone's too busy revelling in the drama that comes with twenty odd NBA players. Cheating scandals, out of wedlock babies, side chick drama and worst of all - the dumbasses who  _ still  _ upload their nudes to iCloud. Jude is good at fading into the background and taking the trouble with him. 

He's the ultimate fixer. 

Hence why he's called into a meeting with Zero, the team's newly signed small forward and Terrence Wall, the longstanding captain. Nobody briefs him on the matter so he finds himself studying their body language. Zero's in a relaxed position, while Terrence is sitting upright and staring ahead. 

Clearly, they're fighting over a woman and Jude can hazard a guess who she is. 

Jelena Howard, the captain of the Devil Girls and all around trouble maker. In all of Jude's years doing this job, she's the smartest - and most conniving - person he's come across. 

Terrence breaks first, turning to Zero and jabbing a finger in his direction. "This asshole keeps hitting on my girl."

Jude maintains an indifferent expression but inside he's wondering why Terrence thinks he can break up with Jelena  _ and  _ claim ownership at the same time. 

Zero doesn't flinch. "Last time I checked, she was single. Plus, she was all over me last night. Check TMZ. It's all there for you to see.'

Terrence's eyes flash with anger. "You were a nobody before you came here. You're using her and everybody can see it."

Jude gives a point to Terrence because Zero  _ is  _ using her. Word on the grapevine is that Zero wants to be top dog and he's willing to ride coattails to get there. 

Jude listens to them go back and forth for a while before interjects; there's not much he can do for either of them. He doesn't control Jelena and he's not stupid enough to get involved directly. 

"You're arguing over Jelena? The same Jelena who does whatever she wants?"

Not many people talk about Jelena Howard that way. Jude's only an exception because Terrence sees him as a minor convenience. The guy he sits in front of so he can threaten  _ other  _ guys.

Terrence folds his arms across his chest and turns back to Jude. "You've been here long enough to know how this works, Jude. I suggest you tell  _ Zero  _ what happened to the last three guys that pulled this stunt."

It's a good note being none of the teammates Terrence is talking about play in the NBA anymore. Zero's by far the most talented person to get mixed up in the Terrence and Jelena cycle of toxicity. It would be a shame for the entire team if Zero found himself a casualty of a preventable war. 

"Terrence, do you mind if talk to Zero alone?"

Terrence sucks his teeth and slowly rises out of his seat. "I'll leave you to it, Jude. Don't let me down."

Jude turns to Zero once the door is closed. "What are you doing? I don't know you very well, but you can't be this stupid?"

Zero visibly balks at Jude's harsh tone, eyes widening in defiance. "Going after what I want. What does it look like?"

"Career suicide. And I know your history. Foster care. Scraping by college with a scholarship that barely covered your essential needs. Almost getting thrown off several teams. Do you really want all of that to be for nothing?"

Zero stares at Jude for a long moment before he adjusts his position, sitting up straight and leaning forward like he's finally taking this seriously. Zero casts a curious eye in Jude's direction. 

"Have we met before?"

Jude has been asked this question so many times that it doesn't affect him anymore. He's just accepted that he's always going to be a stain on the wall that nobody sees. 

"I was there when you inked your deal."

Jude remembers the day like it was yesterday. He was sweaty and exhausted from working overtime to ensure that all of Zero's many skeletons were buried deeply in ironclad closets. All he got in return was the briefest of nods from Oscar and a barely there handshake from Zero. 

Zero smiles suddenly. "Jude  _ Kinkade.  _ You're Oscar's son. I don't think I've seen you since that first party. I didn't get a chance to thank you for making my past go away."

Jude wants to laugh because he's seen Zero since that party. He's seen him a  _ lot _ , but it just goes to show that he's not the most memorable person. If he wasn't so good at his job, his own father wouldn't remember his existence. Jude has no doubts about his place in this world. 

"Yeah, well, that's my job. And my job today is to tell you to leave Jelena alone. Her and Terrence  _ always  _ end up back together. You want to make a mark on this team? Do it on the court."

+

Zero and Terrence's feud appears to have died down by the next game if the half-time jumbotron kiss between Terrence and Jelena is anything to go by. Zero glances up at the large screen, but he doesn't react. He merely trudges off the court at a relaxed pace. The team's just beaten Dallas and are on course to reach the playoffs.

The win against Dallas means that the weekend is going to be full of non-stop partying and drama for Jude to clean up. Not that he minds. He might be on the outskirts, but he's still  _ in  _ this world. He's still surrounded by the glitz and glamour. He has a ten thousand dollar watch on his arm and he finally left his old Honda behind last year. 

Blink and people might miss him, but he's not going anywhere. 

According to the talk in the hallway, the team party is at a club called LOVE. Jude's got one of the doormen on retainer which makes his job even easier. He makes his way there once the media packs out of the arena and orders a club soda from the overly friendly bartender. She bats her eyelashes at him and makes sure their fingers touch when she slides over his drink. He ends the interaction with a polite smile and crisp twenty dollar bill. 

Even if he was interested - and he's not - he doesn't mix business with pleasure. He's here to make sure the players don't get into trouble, not get his dick sucked by a willing bartender. 

"I think..  _ Marissa _ wants to do more than keep the change."

Jude looks up and finds Zero at the other end of the bar, dressed in an open collared pale blue dress shirt paired with a black jacket and black pants. He looks... hot. Not that Jude is interested in him either. He doesn't shit where he eats, even though as the keeper of secrets, he knows who's game. He knows that Zero's had dalliances with men, although, he's only been seen with women since he arrived in Los Angeles. 

"She's not my type."

Zero grabs his drink and joins Jude at his spot. 

"What  _ is _ your type?"

Jude takes a sip in an attempt to buy himself some time. The last thing he needs to do is fall for Zero's charm or even delude himself into thinking that this is a good idea. 

"Listen, Zero, I'm here to make sure that team has a disturbance free evening," Jude says. "If you're looking to get off on fucking the boss's son, don't bother. He doesn't give a shit. And I'm not interested."

With that Jude picks up his glass and heads over to his booth in the VIP section. 

+

Jude's back in his office on Monday morning desperately trying to find the details of an aspiring actress that LA's number fourteen, Devonte Smith, couldn't keep his hands off. Usually, Jude only steps in when extortion demands are made, but he's friendly with Devonte's wife and she happens to be six months pregnant. He wouldn't be able to forgive himself if something happened. 

There's a knock on the door after Jude's fourth phone call leads him nowhere. 

"Come in!" he calls, hoping that his assistant is having better luck than he is. 

Unfortunately, it's not his assistant at the door. 

It's Zero.

He saunters in, dressed in a crew neck t-shirt and tight jeans, his golden hair swept to the side neatly and Jude ignores the sudden swoop in his stomach. He's not going to do  _ anything  _ with Zero, but that doesn't mean he's blind or oblivious to Zero's charm. Anyway, he's merely reacting the way anyone with a functional libido would. 

That's all this is. 

"How can I help you, Zero?" 

"Coach Davenport gave the team the rest of the day off and I've got some free time. I just wanted to see if you wanted to grab lunch."

Jude blinks at Zero. "I'm already in the middle of one crisis, so whatever you've done is going to have to wait. Unless it's Jelena related. You didn't sleep with her again, did you?"

"What? No. I haven't done anything. I was just... asking you out to lunch."

Jude doesn't change his expression. Zero asking him to lunch makes little sense. Jude doesn't do lunch with players. In fact, he's rarely seen around them in public. However, now that Zero's here, maybe he can be useful. 

"Actually, I need your help finding someone who was at the party on Saturday. She went home with DeVonte. She had red hair, a gold dress and 'an ass that wouldn't quit'. DeVonte was extremely unhelpful."

Zero cocks his head to the side and says, "Wait ..Isn't his wife pregnant?"

Jude levels Zero with a deadpan stare. "Like that's stopped any of you before."

"Touché," Zero says with a bitter chuckle, "we're a wretched bunch."

"Can you help or not?"

Zero's lips curve into a smile and Jude groans inwardly at the  _ swoop _ in his stomach. "Have lunch with me and I'll tell you exactly who she is  _ and  _ help you to get her to keep her mouth shut."

Jude turns back to his computer and clicks open an email marked URGENT. "I don't need help. Money usually helps these things go away. I just need a name."

He looks back up and Zero's got an unreadable expression on his face. "Can you do that for me?"

"I'll do you one better," Zero says, pulling out his phone and tapping at the screen briefly. "I bought her a drink and she slipped me her digits before I politely turned her away. Here. Call her."

Jude eyes the phone with trepidation... usually, players don't communicate with him unless they need his help. This back and forth is cute but he would rather Zero come out with whatever  _ he _ needs fixing. 

"Are you sure  _ you're  _ not in trouble? It'll be easier if you just tell me outright. It's my job. I don't need lunch or favours to bail you out."

"Jude, I'm sure. Now are you going to call her or not?"

+

The rest of the week is uneventful and Jude starts to look forward to what's going to be his first weekend off in months. Occasionally, he gets lost in thought wondering why Zero helped him out. He dismisses it every time because it's futile. 

Zero is a player and he's Jude Kinkade - it would never work out. 

He packs up his office early on Friday, grateful that the team have already landed in Houston for their away game. 

He's thinking about what to watch on Netflix when he walks smack bang into someone, dropping his satchel and phone in the process. His head is throbbing slightly, but not enough that he can't see clearly. Zero's crouched down below him, retrieving his now cracked phone screen and his bag. 

"I'll buy you a new one," Zero says. 

Jude frowns. "Shouldn't you be in Houston?"

"Ankle strain. Docs said I had to sit the game out."

"Should you even be here?" Jude asks. "Aren't you supposed to be with the team? Moral support and whatnot."

Zero laughs brashly. "Please. Like any of them care if I'm there or not."

He seems embarrassed by that, like being unliked is the most shameful thing in the world. 

Maybe it is. 

"Oh. Well. I should probably get going. It's my first weekend off in...I don't know how long."

Zero perks up at that. "Sweet. Got any plans?"

Jude hoists his bag on his shoulder and considers his weekend plans - several meals for one and falling asleep in front of Netflix. 

"Not really."

"Wanna hang out?"

_ No  _ is on the tip of his tongue until he's hit by a wave of frustration. He's a grown man with self control. He can hang out with Zero without anything happening. 

"Sure. Why not?"

+

"Are you happy, Jude?"

Jude looks up from where Scarlett Johanson and Adam Driver are awkwardly arguing in whatever movie he clicked on. "Why wouldn't I be? I have money, a job and...family."

"I don't know. Out of all of the people I've met in this town, you're different. Most people pretend that they're happy, but... you just seem sad. Like you're weighed down by everything around you."

Zero's observations are accurate, but that doesn't mean Jude has to admit that. 

"Is there a reason why you've been watching me closely?"

Zero considers the question before he flushes and shakes his head. "No. Well. It's stupid..."

Jude turns back to the movie but fails to pay attention to another second of it. He's too busy wondering why Zero looks so  _ concerned.  _

"Are you worried about something? Is that why you're here?"

"I'm more worried about what Oscar Kinkade would do to me if he thought that I was corrupting his son."

"... but you're not corrupting me," Jude points out. "We're just hanging out, right? Besides, he really wouldn't care."

Zero looks puzzled. "I find that hard to believe. He's your  _ father. _ "

"In name only. He insists that I call him Oscar and I need to schedule a meeting just to see him. He doesn't care, Zero."

"That's... sad. Especially with how hard you work."

"It is what it is. I like my job, Zero. I'm not going to jeopardise it for someone who's only interested in using me. That's what this is, right? You want to use me to get into Oscar's good books? Ask me outright and I'll tell you. You don't need to pretend to like me."

It wouldn't be the first time a player has done that; Jude's been burned enough times to know not to fall for  _ any  _ of the players tricks. The ten thousand dollar watch? That was a gift from Derek Roman. 

The note attached said:  _ thank you for not telling Oscar about the coke. _

"That's not fair," Zero says, snapping Jude out of memory lane. "You might know some details but you don't know  _ me _ ."

"You didn't realise I existed until I was dragged into your drama with Jelena - who you were using. Sounds fair to me."

"That was all business. This is... personal. I like you."

"No you don't."

Zero laughs gently, a soft rumble that sends tingles travelling down Jude's spine. "Want me to prove it?"

Jude swallows hard. "No. Actually, I think I'm going to go."

He gets up from the couch and starts to gather his things, only stopping when a warm hand caresses the skin on his wrist. 

"Don't go."

Jude doesn't wrestle his hand free, but he shakes his head. "I can't stay. Not if it means that we do something that we shouldn't."

Zero uses Jude's wrist to pull him in closely, their chests pressed against each other and lips practically touching.

"One kiss," Zero murmurs against his lips, 'and if you don't want more, I won't stop you from leaving."

Jude relaxes into his touch and whispers, "Fine. Dammit.  _ Fine. _ "

+

Jude wakes up in an unfamiliar but comfortable bed. 

It takes a second for the memories to come rushing through, but when they do his mouth goes dry. 

"Fuck."

Zero stirs in the bed next to him, yawning loudly before he rolls over to face Jude. 

"Think we did enough of that last night."

Jude groans and pushes Zero off him, slowly sitting up and searching for his clothes. He quickly locates a pair of boxers and shoves them on, not caring if they're his or not. 

All he wants to do is get out of here -  _ fast.  _

"Jude, what's the rush?"

"This was a mistake, Zero," Jude says, and there's a dull roar in his head screaming  _ stupid so stupid _ . "One that I'm not going to repeat."

He leaves before Zero can say anything.

+

Jude stays in the following Monday after accepting that he's too ashamed to go in and face  _ anybody _ . After being the utmost professional for years he hates that he's thrown it all away for one night with Zero. One extremely  _ fun _ night, but one night all the same. 

That's part of the reason why he ran. 

Zero isn't the kind of person that  _ likes  _ people for long. Jude knows that for a fact. He's seen the  _ long  _ list of people he's dated. Two weeks ago, Zero was with  _ Jelena  _ which says it all. 

There's nothing in it for Jude, except for their one night. 

None of these players are in it for the long haul. Jude would know, he's stuck watching them fuck up on a daily basis. It doesn't matter how happy they are, their eyes are always wandering and there's always some girl - or guy - waiting to catch them. 

Jude would rather be single and alone than stuck in constant limbo and yet…

... being with Zero was probably the best night of his life. 

+

Tuesday comes with a renewed attitude. Jude decides to pretend that nothing happened, the way he does when a player comes to him with a problem. He makes it go away and suddenly, it no longer exists. 

Unfortunately, Zero has other ideas. 

When Jude arrives at his office, Zero's waiting on the floor by the door. He's engrossed by his phone and Jude takes a second to watch him. That  _ swoop _ arcs in his chest again and he steels himself for what he's about to do. 

"Zero."

Zero looks up and smiles brightly, like Jude's the best thing he's ever seen. "Jude! I wanted to call you, but I didn't have your number."

"For good reason, Zero. What happened between us can't happen again."

Jude waits for Zero to lay on the charm and argue and fight for him, but there's nothing. 

"I know. I had a  _ great  _ time with you, but... I understand why you wouldn't want to do this. I'm not going to push the issue."

The words hit Jude like a slap to the face and he realised that he was right in the first place. 

Zero was only interested in  _ sex  _ and now that he's gotten it, he's done. 

"I have a lot to do, Zero. Thanks for stopping by. I'll see you around?"

Zero nods. "Of course."

+

Another win, another party, except this time Jude's got a thumping headache and he's not in the mood to babysit a bunch of overgrown basketball players. He hangs around for the club for an hour before he leaves. 

He catches a glimpse of Zero talking to a girl when he's pushing through the mass of sweaty bodies and he makes sure his step doesn't falter. When he finally reached outside, the air is warm and clammy and not much better than it was inside. 

"Jude, there you are!"

Jude's heart sinks because he can't deal with Zero, not now. 

"Not now, Zero. I'll see you on Monday, okay?"

"Did I do something wrong?" Zero asks in a low tone. "First you say that we can't... and then you blow me off and run a mile in the opposite direction when you see me. What gives?"

"You made it pretty clear that you weren't interested in more. You got what you wanted and that was that."

Zero blinks away. "I said what I said because  _ you  _ were adamant. I was respecting your wishes."

"Really? So, if I hadn't left your house that day, what? We'd be living happily ever after."

Zero laughs. "Not happily ever after, but…I wasn't lying when I said that I liked you."

Oh. 

_ Oh.  _

"I think that maybe we should go somewhere quiet and talk. Away from everyone else."

"Lead the way."

+

They end up at Jude's modest apartment. It's a one bedroom and moderately furnished. There are a few watercolour abstracts and a frame of him and his mother. Other than that, the walls are ecru and bland, not that Jude spends enough time here to care. 

"Somehow, I pictured you living in something fancier than this. With glass walls and, I don't know,  _ monochrome  _ everything."

Jude drops his keys by the door and shrugs off his jacket. "Oscar doesn't pay me  _ that  _ much."

"He should," Zero says. "You do a lot for us and he keeps you hidden away."

Jude makes his way into the living room and turns on the lights before he grabs some beers from the kitchen. 

"He doesn't keep me hidden away, you just never noticed me before."

The tips of Zero's ears turn pink and Jude knows he has him bang to rights. Oddly enough, he's not upset. Being invisible is kind of the nature of his job. 

"Well, I'm noticing you now and... I can't look away."

Jude takes a swig of his beer and sits across from Zero who's on one side of his shabby couch. "I can't  _ date  _ you, Zero. I probably shouldn't have slept with you, but that's done. Going forward, things need to be strictly business."

Zero is picking at the label on his beer bottle when Jude looks up at him. 

"What if I'm not okay with that?"

Jude isn't sure if Zero is being serious. He can have anyone he wants and he wants Jude? It doesn't make sense. 

"Did losing Jelena do something to you? Is that it? You think that dating me is the perfect antidote to her. No one will know and you get to have whatever you want in secret."

Zero's eyes widen slowly, like he's never looked at things from that angle before. He takes his time to answer, visibly mulling over Jude's words. 

"That's not it."

Jude wants to believe him, but it's not the most convincing answer. 

"I think maybe it is and I think that I'm not going to be a rebound in whatever twisted game you're playing."

Once again, Zero takes his time to reply and when it does, it's a simple, "Okay."

He leaves before Jude can escort him out. 

+

Jude goes back to being invisible save for the team's mishaps. None of the players acknowledge him in the hallway. There are no high fives, no one watching him in a dimly lit club, nobody laughing with him over stupid commercials. 

He does everything he can to keep that night with Zero out of his mind and yet…

... nothing works. 

No one has ever looked at him the way Zero did. 

No one has ever stroked his face with calloused fingers, looked him in the eyes and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and said, "I never once forgot who you were."

In the time he's been working for the team no one has  _ ever  _ wanted to be seen with him in public. 

Except Zero. 

+

The call comes on a Sunday morning on Jude's personal line. 

“We can’t find Zero.”

Jude blinks sluggishly while the words filter in. 

“He’s injured, right? Maybe he’s just recuperating somewhere?”

“The coach cleared him to play, Jude. He’s supposed to be here. We don’t need any more scrutiny.”

It’s Terrence on the line which makes things even  _ stranger _ (although maybe it’s because Jude’s still trying to wake up). 

“I’ll find him.”

The line goes dead without a response. 

+

It takes Jude two hours, but he finally realises something he’s never consciously known before. Zero grew up in L.A. That means that he’s probably not in Australia or somewhere equally as crazy. If he’s hiding for whatever reason, he’s doing it in plain sight. 

Jude has to figure out where (and why). 

He leaves his assistant to drive around while he sits in his office and studies Zero’s file carefully. There’s a foster home listed as his old home address and Jude thinks -  _ what the hell -  _ and inputs it into Google Maps. 

By the time he gets there, Terrence and Pete have called him six times. The game's in a couple of hours, but it's obvious Zero won't be able to play. He texts both of them as much along with a bullshit story for them to feed to the press about Zero being sick.

Once that's done, he exits his car and tries to find the house he saw on Zero's file. Instead he comes face to face with a large sign that says 'under construction' and a wooden board that now has a huge hole in it. There's a glint in the distance and Jude turns to find Zero's sleek black Aston Martin parked two spots behind his car. 

With a weary sigh and gnawing feeling in his gut, he pushes through the gap in the board and follows the pathway leading directly to an ajar front door. It's eerily quiet, save for birds chirping in the distance and Jude braces himself for what he's about to see. 

He pushes the door open and scans the room quickly, only pausing when he sees a slumped figure on the floor.

It's Zero.

Jude rushes towards him, kneeling down slowly and nudging Zero's shoulder, just a gentle push to avoid startling him. 

"I'm awake, I'm fine," Zero mumbles, like he's on autopilot. 

Jude shakes him this time. "Zero."

It takes a few seconds for Zero's eyes to open slowly and Jude observes the switch from irritation to confusion to realisation. 

"S-shit," Zero says. "What are you doing here?"

Jude leans in and brushes Zero's blonde hair away from his face. "People are looking for you."

"Fuck. The game. Shit. Pete is going to kill me. I have to get to the arena."

Zero's words and actions don't match because he doesn't make any attempt to actually get up. Considering the amount of dust around him, the pallor of his skin and the dark circles under his eyes... he's in no condition to play anyway. 

Jude reaches out and places a hand on Zero's shoulder. "Relax, man. I told them that you're sick...and I don't think I was far off. We just need to get a team doctor to sign off on it and everything will be fine."

Zero seems to deflate slowly and Jude can't help but wonder what drove him here to begin with. 

+

Jude's on the phone to Pete while Zero showers and sorts himself out. The team doctors left half an hour ago after diagnosing Zero with exhaustion and ordering him to rest over the next forty eight hours. Pete's ranting about Zero letting the team down, not that Jude is paying close attention. He's busy watching Zero stare through his living room window blankly. 

It's obvious that this behaviour is out of character and even more so that Jude's the catalyst somehow.

"He's mad, huh?" Zero's watching Jude now and motioning towards his phone. 

"He'll live." 

Jude cuts off the call without saying goodbye. 

Technically, he's not the team's licensed therapist, but his job involves more talking than he'd ever imagined. He knows that Derek goes on coke benders to forget the fact that his mom is never around. He knows that Terrence gets terrible performance anxiety if Jelena isn't by his side. It's all irrelevant to him. He soaks up their secrets and files them away for next time. 

Zero's different. Not just because they had sex, but...Jude feels like they understand each other on a level that's deeper than surface. 

"Do you want to talk about anything?" 

Zero smiles, a weak grin that's a poor attempt at bravado. "Not really, but... I'll tell you anything that you want to know."

"What's going on? Why did you go back to that old house?"

Zero bites his lip momentarily before he shrugs. "This life... the cars, the money, the  _ girls _ ...It's a good way to forget the real. The way I grew up, the foster homes, struggling to make ends meet... you already know the story."

"It's okay to want to take a break from everything."

"That's not it, Jude. I guess I just caught pretending that I'm not the  _ same  _ guy. It didn't really hit me until you sat in your office and ripped me a new one."

"Oh. I'm sorry, I--"

"Don't apologize," Zero cuts in, "you were right to lay into me like that and...You didn't have to. You could have let me fall flat on my face in front of the entire world."

"I was just doing my job."

"Is that what today is...your  _ job _ ?"

"Yeah, Zero, it is," Jude says. "... but that doesn't mean that I don't care. That was I wasn't freaking out when nobody could find you."

"You found me," Zero smiles, like it's a revelation. 

"Can I ask you a question?" Jude says. "Why did you ask me if we'd met before?"

Zero rolls his shoulders back slowly, like he's trying to ease the tension. "It's stupid, but... most people that talk to me have this kind of deference. Like I'm better than them. With you...It just...Felt like I knew you already. Like we were equal."

"And…"

Zero's hesitant, eyes downward when he eventually says, "I suppose I  _ was  _ intrigued by the idea of  _ befriending _ Oscar Kinkade's son. Only because Oscar picked Terrence's side over mine... and then  _ you  _ did too. I don’t usually react well when my house of cards topples over."

Jude isn't surprised by the admission. There's  _ always  _ an angle when people pay attention to him. 

"I felt bad. I...feel bad,” Zero adds. “It's why I didn't push it when you said you wanted nothing to do with me. That’s when I realised that I’d screwed up  _ again _ ."

"I see."

There's a million other things Jude wants to say, but the words don't come. 

"Jude, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Jude says. "Everyone connected to this team is calculated in one way or another. Devils Nation, rise up.”

+

This time it's Tyrone Johnson. 

There's a domestic incident with his girlfriend and while the police weren't called, there's video footage and it's ugly. 

It's the kind of thing that Oscar and the board can't keep hidden yet they forward the files onto Jude with a simple message.

_ Make it go away.  _

It's not going anywhere, and even if it was...Jude is done. He's done covering up the bullshit, done protecting people that wouldn't spit on him if he was on fire. 

Jude fires off a quick response informing whoever it concerns that he  _ quits _ and shuts his laptop. It's got confidential files stored on it, but it's  _ his  _ laptop. 

Or a contingency plan if he needs one because he's  _ done.  _

He quietly packs his office and calls his assistant to let her know that she'll be reporting to someone else from now on.

Ever since Zero confessed that he  _ did  _ have an ulterior motive for getting to know Jude, it's all that's been on his mind. Namely the fact that he'd be a hypocrite to judge when that's the nature of his job. Pretending that he gives a shit about the players so they don't tarnish the brand. Befriending au pairs that the players are too stupid not to fuck and charming them so they won't sell their stories to TMZ. 

He's done it all and maybe he shouldn’t be so quick to judge Zero for doing the same thing, but appreciate the fact that he was self-aware enough to admit it. 

+

Zero's house is shrouded by carefully placed shrubbery and luckily, there are no paparazzi outside when Jude shows up. 

"Wasn't expecting to see you here," Zero says after he's welcome Jude in. 

"I quit my job."

That catches Zero off guard and he almost stumbles. Jude keeps him up with a steady hand, only letting go when Zero turns around. 

"Why?"

Jude chuckles, a bitter sound that sounds too harsh to his own ears. "I was mad at you because I felt like you manipulated me. Told myself that you were just like everyone else. And then Oscar tried to get me to cover up Tyrone's drama and I realised that... I'm the same."

"I think we need to sit down for this conversation," Zero says. "Pete called a team meeting and told us that Tyrone was innocent. That we weren't to say otherwise."

That usually the official story. Denial. After a few days (or hours depending on the news cycle), the news dies down and people no longer care. 

"I saw the video right before I quit. They wanted me to spin it. Make it go away." 

"Jude… "

"I've already leaked the video online. It's not much, but... yeah. Didn't know what to do with myself after so I came here."

"You can't do much more than that," Zero points out. 

Jude swallows, grimacing at the sour bile in his throat. "Why do I feel so helpless?"

"When I was growing up in foster care, there was this kid called Kevin," Zero says. He was older than me. Taught me how to ball. How to shave. Shit like that. He was also a giant prick. He'd go out and rob old ladies.  _ Literally.  _ One day... he asked me to go with him. Part of me wanted to.  _ Really  _ wanted to."

"... but you didn't…"

Zero snorts. "I chickened out, but after that day he shunned me, I'd have given anything to do it over. I was so mad at myself for not mugging old ladies. It's ridiculous, right? But sometimes we find ourselves doing shitty things just for approval. It might not make us  _ good  _ people, but it doesn't make us bad either. Just fucked up."

Jude folds his lips and presses them together so hard that he feels a dull pain. 

"I don't know why I came here. I mean, it was better than my other option - getting a well deserved 'told you so' from my mom, but…I don't know."

The words are true, because he's not sure what he wants from Zero. Or why he's so drawn to him after everything that happened. 

"I'm glad you did because... I've missed you," Zero says. "A lot."

Jude smiles despite himself. "I've missed you too."

+

Jude receives a job offer via email two weeks after he quit. 

It doesn't say much, just that a public figure is in need of a publicist and they thought he might be interested.

Truth be told, Jude's spent much of the past two weeks sitting at home and licking his wounds. He hasn't been looking for a job. His work with the team was never for monetary gain. Not when Oscar granted him a very generous trust fund that's still in place despite his resignation. 

Jude deletes the email and goes back to binge watching The Crown on Netflix. 

+

Four weeks into Jude's downtime, there's a knock on his door. It's late in the evening, and he's not expecting anybody. Even if he was, he's in baggy sweats and a worn out t-shirt. He decides to just leave it and silently prays for whoever it is to go away. 

He's just about to resume his TV show when there's another knock. 

"Jude, it's Zero. I know you're in there."

Jude turns off the television entirely and gets off the couch, pacing briefly before he decides to hear Zero out and send him on his way quickly. 

"I called you earlier, but it went straight to voicemail," Zero says after Jude let's him in. "I was worried that you'd hole up here after you left the team."

Jude shrugs slowly and head back over to the couch. "My phone died and I decided not to charge it. It's not like I have a bunch of friends who care about me."

Zero scoffs indelicately. "Jude, as much as I'd love to sit here and entertain your one-man pity party, I'm not going to. The same way you came and got me, I'm getting you."

"What does that mean?" Jude asks.

"I want you to come and work for me as my publicist."

Jude frowns at Zero's words... the email was from  _ him _ ?

Zero continues: "Look, whatever happened between us... it was fun. I don't regret it. I don't regret you, but I care about you too much to let you sit here and waste away."

"Don't you have a game tomorrow?"

Something flickers in Zero's eyes, but his voice is passive when he answers. "You know that I do. The way you know everything there is to know. You said that if I wanted to make it to the top, I had to do it the right way and I am. With you on my team, I hope." 

It's a tempting offer and a dangerous one given the way Jude's heart is hammering against his chest.

If he wasn't in touch with his feelings, he might try to convince himself that Zero will say anything to get him on board. That Zero's presence in his apartment means nothing, that their dalliance was just a fling, a way for them both to pass time. 

However, the truth is too hard to deny. He  _ likes  _ Zero and there's no way he's going to pass up this chance to be close to him. 

+

Jude's official base is a spare room in Zero's house that they turn into an office. He deals with media requests, social media and any public appearances that Zero is scheduled for. Despite the work being fast paced and  _ exhausting _ , Jude enjoys it. He feels better when he gets home at night, that dirty itch he used to get after covering up secrets and transgressions is gone and…

... he gets to spend a  _ lot _ of time with Zero. 

"Jude, do you have the questions for that interview I'm doing tomorrow?" Zero's munching on a celery stick when he walks into the office, still dressed in his practise gear. 

"Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that," Jude tells him. "I know that being smooth and charismatic is your  _ thing _ but there is such a thing as too much charisma."

Zero's eyebrow curves into a delicate arch. "I beg to differ."

Jude switches documents and finds the one with the notes he made after Zero's last interview. 

"People think that you're arrogant, smarmy and full of yourself.".

Zero stares at him. "Well, they're not wrong."

It took Jude several stressful days to realise that Zero, the professional basketball player isn't the same guy as  _ Gideon _ , the boy who was told he'd never amount to anything. While Zero is a beast on court, Jude wishes he would drop the act when it's just them. 

"You're so much more than that, Zero, and if you let people in, they'll see that too."

Zero shrugs. "Fine. What do I need to do?"

"What? No argument? No witty comment about how they can't handle your... awesomeness or whatever."

Zero grimaces at Jude's choice of words, shrugging when he says, "I trust you."

The words hang in the air, simple and complex at the same time. 

They've kept everything professional since Jude accepted the job. The secret glances have gone unmentioned. The long moments of uninterrupted eye contact are broken by distractions and…

... Jude knows they're kidding themselves. 

"I like you, Zero. Like... _ like you _ like you... and you like me. And if this is awkward for me, it's got to me awkward for you. So... how do we make it  _ not  _ awkward…"

Zero's lips curl into a grin. "I'm probably the wrong person to ask, but…I have an idea."

+

Jude's covered in sweat and just about to shoot when…

...Zero swoops in and steals the ball from him. He dribbles towards the hoop and shoots, whooping loudly when the ball sails through. 

Jude watches on with bemusement because he's confused. When Zero said he had a way to relieve the tension brewing between them, he didn't think that he meant impromptu _ best of five _ one-on-one basketball. 

Now he's standing here with his dress shirt rolled up, giant sweat patches on his back and more pent up frustration. 

To make things worse Zero ditched  _ his _ shirt after game three and Jude's been gazing at rippling muscles and bronzed skin for the last thirty minutes and wondering how he's going to drive home with a hard-on.

"Wanna play another game?" Zero asks. "You're actually kind of good."

Jude wipes the sweat off his brow and says, "Zero. Stop. We  _ both  _ know what happens after we step off this court. We can either play until we're exhausted, or just...skip ahead to the good part."

"I'm a professional basketball player, Jude. I've done enough skipping ahead. What happens if I want to take it slow?"

_ That's _ a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. 

"What's your definition of taking it slow?"

Zero clears his throat and takes a step forward and then another until he's within touching distance. "I make you dinner. I get to know you and then... when we're ready? We pick up where we left off."

Jude bites at his bottom lip while he ponders Zero's words. "Okay. I... I can get on board with that. Starting tomorrow."

Zero releases a breathy chuckle. "Lead the way."

+

Tomorrow comes along with a frank discussion about what their potential relationship would entail. 

Or, that's what Jude  _ tries  _ to initiate before one of them pounces on the other and they pick up where they left off. 

Once they're done, Jude flips back down onto Zero's bed with a satisfied sigh. "I came over to  _ talk,  _ Zero."

Zero's hand traces over his knuckles before slipping into his seamlessly, like it's always belonged there. "So talk."

"Obviously, I  _ work  _ for you, which is awkward, but I want to make it clear that we're  _ friends  _ first before anything else."

"Always, Jude."

"You wanted to be on top and... maybe together we can make it there. The right way. No guts, no glory. No games... just... Playing the hand of cards that we're dealt with."

Jude spent much of the past day planning what he was going to say to the point where he's imagined Zero's response. 

In every single scenario, he never once predicted silence. 

Except, all he can hear is the sound of their breathing and the faint honking in the distance. 

"I love you," Zero says after what seems like an age. "More than I love the idea of being the next Kobe. I'm with you. We can do this together."

Jude smiles and leans over to press a chaste kiss to Zero's lips. "I love you too."

+

It's the championship final and Zero's just secured the team's win with a last second dunk. 

Pandemonium ensues and all Jude can hear is the roar of twenty thousand people in the stands behind him. He makes his way from his court side seat, past Jelena who's hugging Terrence, and a stream of other celebrating players until he finds Zero. 

He sees the moment Zero spots him, smiles at the way his blue eyes light up and sparkle brighter than everything else on the court. He slips through the thrum of people until it's just them (and a thousand cameras).

"We did it," Zero whispers before he pulls back and grabs Jude's face in his hands, grinning again before he leans in and kisses him soundly. 

For Jude, time stands still and everything fades into the background. 

Zero's  _ kissing  _ him on court.

In front of twenty thousand people. 

"Sorry, I couldn't resist," Zero says when he breaks the kiss. "I can't believe I just did that. Fuck."

The adrenaline is starting to wear off and Jude knows he has to get Zero out of here now, before everything they've worked so hard for crumbles around them. 

They need to strategize and play this to their advantage, need to turn this moment into the  _ mother  _ of all victories. 

Just... not tonight.

Tonight is about  _ them _ and suddenly, Jude wants to be anywhere but here. 

"Don't be sorry," Jude says. "C'mon, let's get out of here."

They run off the court hand-in-hand, with hundreds of reporters screaming questions and calling after Zero. 

Jude knows that they're going to have to answer for this tomorrow when the buzz dies down, but right now he doesn't give a damn.

They've been dealt a royal flush and he intends to enjoy it. 

-fin


End file.
